


Once Upon an Us

by Awssanfilippo



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Beauty and the Beast Elements, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Gentle Kylo, Heavily inspired by Beauty and the Beast, Hux is definitely Cogsworth, Slow Burn, Soft Kylo Ren, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:13:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24781354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Awssanfilippo/pseuds/Awssanfilippo
Summary: This is my first time writing a fic, but I've had this idea of a beauty and the beast inspired type of situation bouncing around in my head and I wasn't finding anything else that was satisfying the need. Constructive criticism is definitely welcome since I want to write more after this. This is not meant to be cannon-like at all, and I have no idea where it would even fit in the sequel timeline. I just like the idea of Kylo being princely/emperor-like and living in a remote castle. See my twitter @AlyssaSanfilip1
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s), Kylo Ren/Reader, kylo/reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introducing our reader/oc, Eden, and why she ends up at a castle the First Order is using as a base.

  
Eden

You were just getting invested in finishing this painting. It was of the beach your father had taken you and your mother to visit all the time when you were a child. Of course after your mother’s passing he would never take you there anymore. You missed going there as a family. Playing in the water, collecting shells, and having picnics on the sand. Then a pounding on the door woke you from the daydream. You let out a frustrated sigh, “I’ll be right there”. Putting down the brush and wiping your hands on your apron, heading for the door. “Mr.Smith, how may I help you”, a disheveled, slightly sweaty man stood on the doorstep. The town librarian was the only person who had ever paid you and your father any kindness. He’d never questioned you for how many books you’d borrow, or how you never paid any attention the the young men in town, and never joined in on the whispers that your father was just a useless drunk. None of them knew that he hadn’t always been this way.  
“Eden, it’s your father.”, he said while trying to catch his breath “He’s been arrested by the First Order. They have him at the castle. He was talking a bunch of nonsense in the pub, and some stormtroopers tried to question him. Of course he had to try to pick a fight, and they took him away. You and I know he didn’t really mean it!” You would have to go get him, and hope that his charge wasn’t too serious.  


Racing through the forest on her horse, you knew your only hope was to plead with them to let him go. He was a mess. If you could just explain to them that he wasn’t in his right mind and he didn’t mean any real harm. You thought for a moment, would it really be so bad if they didn’t let him go. Then again it would only invite more gossip and whispers about you when you walked through town. The girl who’s mad, drunk father got arrested by the First Order. You didn’t know what you would say when you got there. What Father had done was technically treason, but you had to do something. He was your father after all, even if he wasn’t the best at actually being one.  
You hated riding your horse through this part of the forrest at night. It was notorious for members of the crime syndicate attacking and robbing riders. Many young women had even been kidnapped and held for ransom, or worse. Your white horse made you stand out like a bacon on the trail. Hopefully you and Father would be home soon and this would just be an awful memory.

Amazed you’d been able to get this far, you were being marched down a stone hallway by to guards.The only sound, their boots and your dress swishing around your feet. They were taking you to see the Supreme Leader and his generals. They would be the ones to decide your father’s fate in the end. You’d already spoken to several guards and two different officers and told them your story, each saying it wasn’t up to them. You’d assumed they’d just turn you away, but you hoped with all your might that someone would hear you out. Just when you thought they were going to dismiss you, they would order the guards to take you to the next higher up. So now here you were, standing in the same room as the Supreme Leader. “Sir, this girl is here for the prisoner we took in earlier this evening”, “The treasonous drunk” a modified voice came from a tall figure standing by the window. You’d only heard of the Supreme Leader in stories. That he a was a terrifying monster that slayed entire villages. Not one known for his mercy or empathy for sure. ”Well, woman, speak”,the modified voice came again. “He’s my father, sir. And he isn’t in his right mind obviously. Please, let him go.”, “So he can assault one of my soldiers again?” The voice replied. “I can watch him sir, make sure he doesn’t do it again”. “No, I think the old man needs some motivation to stay in line, and be a good citizen.” The figure turned to face you and the guards. His face was covered by a black and silver metal mask. It was riddled with burning red cracks, like it had once been shattered and repaired again. “What if we kept her here instead, sir. With the threat of harm befalling his precious daughter, the old man surely would not act out again.” A ginger haired man sitting in a wingback chair in the corner piped up. The thought crossed your mind, did you really have anything much to loose if you had to stay here. Your hobbies maybe? It’s not like you had any friends that would miss you besides Mr.Smith. “Supreme Leader sir, if I took my father’s place as a prisoner would you let him go?” He took a moment, that felt like eternity. Certainly her was mulling over what would be in his best interest. “Fine” he said curtly. He took long powerful strides until he was right in front of you. “You will stay here, and serve your father’s sentence in his place. And the drunken oaf will be free to walk his way back to town.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get Kylo's POV for the first time, and Eden get's upgraded from her cell.

Eden  
You were sitting on the cold hard bunk, that would be your bed for however long you would be held here. No one had told you how long your father’s sentence was supposed to be. Would it be years, months, the rest of your life? However long, it was too much to think about right now. You sat, just looking at your hands. Maybe you’d be allowed some sort of time out of your cell for good behavior. If you were just quiet and didn’t do anything to upset the guards you could maybe even be released early. You didn’t know how long you sat there like that, or when you eventually laid down on the bunk. You tried to curl your legs up and cover them with your dress for warmth but it was no use. You just laid there, staring at the security camera in the corner. It’s red recording light blinking every couple seconds. You fell asleep eventually, thinking who was on the other side of that camera watching you.

  
Kylo  
She had just sat there for such a long time. She didn’t look sad really, not like how someone who had just lost their freedom and everything they loved should look. She was blank, but you could tell that she was hurting somehow. Not just from this, but from something else. Something that had building for a long time. There was another quality to her you couldn’t place. Something deep down that felt like she was supposed to be here. But for what purpose? She must have a great love for her father if she’d be willing to just take his place like that though. That was something you didn’t understand. But you could respect a normal person doing it. As you watched her finally lay down to sleep, you turned to your general, Hux. “Who was she?” You asked flatly. “Well sir, from what I could find, she has had a fairly normal life. Her father was a carpenter before his wife, the girl’s mother, fell suddenly ill and died. The man drunk and gambled himself into poverty and the girl was left to care for the both of them on her own. They only recently came to this town a few cycles ago. Tragic, surely, but no excuse for the father’s treason.” You looked back at the screen that displayed the girl’s cell. She was a strange one for sure, but she looked so peaceful sleeping there. Beautiful even. You watched her shiver, and a strange pain stabbed at your chest. This would not do. You could not be feeling sympathy for the girl. That would surely lead to attachment, and weakness following it. You could not sit and watch the girl waste away in a cell day by day. There was a blurred line though. How much was too much for someone who was supposed to be a prisoner? “Hux, have some servant prepare one of the spare rooms for the girl.”, and with that order you left. The girl would still be your prisoner, but she would at least be allowed the comfort of a real bed and clean clothes.

Eden  
“Come with me ma’am.” A servant stood at your open cell door with two guards right behind her. “Where are we going?” You asked quietly. “The Supreme Leader has decided that you will stay in a suite, not in this cold, damp cell.” You were shocked, but did not argue. Your first night had been uncomfortably long and the thought of a real room made you afraid to say anything that might make someone change their mind. You followed the servant up several sets of stairs, and through the large castle that the First Order was using as a base for the higher up generals. You had read that it had once belonged to a king and queen that had ruled the planet until they were overthrown by the people. You could tell that a long time ago, this had been a beautiful, bright, happy place full of laughter and music. Now there were long First Order banners lining the walls every few feet, and thick black curtains had been drawn over the large windows. It made the castle dark and intimidating. You’d seen the large airfield on your way in yesterday. It looked terribly out of place next to the old castle. “The Supreme Leader has said you are free to wander the grounds but I would advise steering clear of the airfield and any of the ships. The only places that will be off limits to you are his private quarters of course, and the throne room. Also, he has requested that you eat dinner with him in the dining room each night.” She stopped outside a set of grand double doors, and opened them, stepping inside. “This will be your quarters. The guards will come to get you for meal time, so please expect to be back in your quarters for them to retrieve you.” You nodded and gave the servant a small smile. Hopefully the servants would show you some sort of kindness, and this wouldn’t be so bad. She and the two stormtrooper guards left, closing the door behind them. You turned slowly, taking in your new quarters. It was a large room, with light grey walls and dark hardwood floors. There was a large four poster bed with white and pale pink bedding, and more pillows than you’d ever seen in your life. There was a large fireplace, a siting area, and a door leading to what you assumed was the bathroom. There were large windows, where the curtains had been drawn back to let in the natural light. This room was quite the opposite to the rest of the castle you had seen. There had obviously been some remodeling besides military features since the First Order started using this place. You walked slowly to the bed and sat down, testing it, and sank into the bedding. You couldn’t believe it. What was the reason for all this? You walked over to a large wardrobe and opened it, not really sure what you’d find but mostly expecting it to be empty. To your surprise it was filled with gowns and shoes and jewelry, some newer and some worn. You closed the wardrobe and backed away. You walked into the bathroom, and found it fully stocked with a variety of soaps, oils, and other items you had never seen before. You stood in shock. Why was the Supreme Leader giving you all this. Why would he give all this to a prisoner who was supposed to be here serving time for treason. For some reason this felt like a trick. But looking down at your dress you realized how dirty you were, you thought it didn’t really matter if it was. The hem of your dress was soaked and muddy, some from the ride to the castle, some from the general filth of the cells below. If the Supreme Leader was going to give this all to you, you might as well use it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo has been thinking about Eden

Eden  
You walked over to the large marble bathtub, started the water and poured in one of the rose scented soaps. The tub filled with hot water and bubbles. You stepped inside, and let yourself sink up to your chin. You took your time washing away the cold that had soaked into your bones and the layer of dirt from the past night. After getting out and putting on a robe that hung on a hook nearby, you walked to the wardrobe and looked inside. You knew you’d be expected to have dinner with the Supreme Leader tonight, and you’d have to wear one of these dresses. You caught yourself wondering witch one he would like best, and realized that you’d never cared what anyone thought about what you wore before this. Much less what a man thought about what you wore. Eventually you chose a black dress with embroidered gold stars all over it. After putting it on you fashioned your long dark hair into a sort of braided crown, sticking in pins with gold stars that matched your dress. You stood in front of a long mirror, admiring the work you’d done. You’d never worn anything half as nice as this. You looked out the large window, and saw the the sun was almost setting. With no idea when the stormtroopers would come for you for dinner, you sat down on the couch and just waited. After some time they did come, and lead you back down the dark corridors to a large dining room. The Supreme Leader already sat at the head of the long table. Unsure how to address him or what was expected, you gave a small curtsy, “Supreme Leader, sir.” He nodded and gestured toward the seat to his right. You walked quietly toward him, as though even the sound of your shoes on the floor or the rustling of your dress would upset him and you’d be back in that cell. You sat gently in the chair and folded your hands in your lap. Servants brought out the meal, and set a plate in front of you and the Supreme Leader. You sat waiting for him to make the first move, letting you know it was ok to eat. “You may eat” he said flatly through his mask, as if he had heard your thoughts. You both sat silently for the time it took you to clear your plate. It was so strange to have him watching you, like he was studying you. What was the reason for this, you wondered? Surely there was a camera in you room he could watch you eat from. You didn’t dare even sneak a glance up at him, but he didn’t touch his food at all. Once you’d finished he motioned for the stormtroopers to lead you back to your room.

  
This went on for about a week. During the days you’d explore the castle or the surrounding grounds, and in the evening you would dine while the Supreme Leader would watch you in silence. You’d started making sort of a game during dinner. You’d try to imagine what the Supreme Leader had done that day. If he sat straight up in his chair during the meal, maybe he spent the day doing something important and he was anxious to get back to it. If he was slouching and nonchalant, maybe he spent the day in boring meetings and this was just another thing he had to sit through. You wished he’d eat, at talk, do paper work, something other than just sit there.  
One morning you woke up to a stack of books on the table in your room, and you spent the next few days under a tree on the grounds reading them. Some of them you’d read before but you were grateful for any mental stimulation. You really wanted your paints though. Maybe if you asked nicely, someone would get you some. Who to ask though? You could try to ask the Supreme Leader during dinner. You’d have to muster up some courage though.

  
Kylo  
You stood by the the window in your chambers, overlooking the grounds. There she was, sitting under a tree reading a book that you had left for her. She looked so peaceful, lost in the world of whichever book she had chosen today. You would have to get her more from the library soon. But which ones would she like? It was so hard to tell, as she had looked the same reading them all. Every day you stood here, watching her read a different book and each day she sat there smiling reading the whole thing. Until she would look up, notice the sun’s position in the sky, and scurry off. Surely to her room to get ready for dinner with you, since she would come to the dining room in a different dress. You liked the idea of her rushing off to make herself look nice for you. You liked thinking about how the books you left her had brought her some kind of joy. You liked just thinking about her. She was sweet and gentle, which was something you were not. Just then she looked up from her book and you backed away from the window so she could not look up and see your face. She was leaving to get ready to see you, you felt your heart skip a beat and scowled. You should not be having these feelings. You had been dreaming about her as well. Dreaming about sitting under that tree with her, actually sharing a meal with her, her sitting at your right hand side on the throne, her in your bed at night. You shook the thoughts from your head. That was not something that you should be thinking about so close to seeing her. All this pining, and you barely knew her. You didn’t even know her name, and doubted she really knew yours. You needed to know her, and maybe it would help ease these feelings. You turned away and stared toward the dining room.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of a friendship

Eden  
You were standing in front of the wardrobe deciding what you would wear to dinner tonight, when there was a knock on your door. You opened it to find the servant accompanied by the storm troopers. “Oh no, it’s not dinner time yet is it?’ You asked, panicked. “No ma’am, the Supreme Leader is requesting that you wear this to dinner” the servant said, giggling, as she produced a garment bag and two boxes. You backed away from the door to allow her to come in. She laid the gifts on the bed and you walked over to unzip the bag. Inside was a ruby red dress covered in coordinating roses and smaller gold flowers. You gasped in awe. It was beautiful. Suddenly you looked up at the servant, “You know, I just realized I don’t know your name.” She blinked at you, shocked, “Abigale, ma’am. Abby if you please.”, “Well Abby, thank you for bringing the dress. I hope I will see you again soon.” You smiled at each other, then she curtsied and left you alone with the gifts. This was lovely, but had taken precious time that you could be using to get ready and you were sure the Supreme Leader would not be kept waiting just because of a new dress. As you were slipping into it and lacing the corset on the back you stopped a moment and thought, did you know the Supreme Leader’s name either? You had to think hard, had you ever heard anyone address him as anything other than his official title? Once, you had only heard it once. While in the market, you had heard some men talking about the Supreme Leader. They had called him Kylo Ren. A strange name, but he was a sort of strange man. You were both sitting at dinner as usual, and you were trying to think of how to ask him for the paints. You were drawing a blank though. The only thing you could do was to just ask. What was the worst he could do? Say no?

Today must have been different, because instead of staring off into the distance, or straight ahead, he was resting his chin on his fist and was watching you. You shifted in your seat and slowly put down your fork. “Sir…” you started quietly. “You’ve been very generous. With the room, the books, and the dresses. And I am so grateful, but I was wondering if I might be able to ask you for one more small thing?” He sat up straight, “And what would that be?”, “I used to paint, at home. I would love it if I could do that here.” He was silent for a moment. “That could be arranged.” You smiled, “Thank you, sir.” You considered a moment and spoke up again, “How was your day today?” He stared at you some more before he replied slowly “You’ve already gotten what you wanted. There is no reason to try to butter me up.” That hurt. You looked up into the visor of his helmet, hoping to see his eyes but coming up blank. “I’m not trying to butter you up. I was genuinely curious. I was just thinking that if I am going to be here for a long time we might as well try to be friendly to one another. But if that is overstepping boundaries too much…” you trailed off. “No,” he exclaimed, “That would be fine. But I would prefer to talk about your day.” “I’m sure what you’re doing is much more interesting. I had breakfast by myself in the garden, and took a walk down to the lake. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon reading one of the books you gave me. Boring stuff really.” You didn’t want to admit how much you actually looked forward to dinner time with him. It was the only time you got to be around anyone else though, other than the stormtrooper guards that always followed you at a distance. “I’m kind of lonely during the day, really. But at least I have the freedom of only having one appointment to keep,” you let out a breathy laugh, “I’m sure you have tons of responsibilities during the day, and hardly any time to do anything you actually enjoy.” He considered this before he replied, “You’re right, I do have an empire to run. But I make time for a few important things.” “Like what? What do you enjoy doing?” “I spend most of my free time meditating.” He said a little too quickly. He was lying, and you made a mental note not to push further. Whatever he was doing must be private. “What did you do back in the village? Besides painting, I mean.” He continued. “Well, before my mother died she was trying to teach me all the things that an accomplished lady should know how to do. She didn’t get far though. I spent most of my time reading, painting, mending dresses for the ladies in the village, or tending our small flower garden. We used to have a piano, but we had to sell it.” The two of you went back and forth like this for a couple hours, until you started yawning and one of the servants offered to bring in a pot of tea. “Oh no,” you got up from the table and stretched, “That won’t be necessary. We should call it a night.” You gave Kylo a quick curtsy and started heading back to your quarters but he stood before you could leave. “Let me escort you back to your room.” You smiled and nodded. It was nice to finally have a conversation with him. It wasn’t your intention to get anything other than company from it, but it did cross your mind that this could help him trust you more. And that could lead to more freedoms. Maybe even a trip or two off the grounds.


	5. Chapter 5

Kylo

The next morning, you were sitting at your desk, with chair faced toward the window. You had a perfect view of the garden, where Eden was clipping roses. You wanted to do something nice for her. Something more than just getting her some paints. You wanted to see her beautiful face smiling up at you, and to be together with her as often as you could. Just then, Hux let himself into your study. “You called for me, sir.” “Yes. Sit please. I need your advise.” You paused, “I want to do something for the girl.” Hux rolled his eyes at this, “Why on earth would you want to do that? She’s supposed to be a prisoner here sir, and you’re treating her like she’s some kind of guest.” “She’s done nothing wrong, there’s no reason she shouldn’t be allowed some enjoyment while she is here.” You glared at him. “Or you’re catching feelings for this girl. Which, might I remind you, would be frowned upon. Not only is she technically a prisoner, she’s also a commoner.” “I don’t recall asking for your opinion, General Hux.” You spat, “I need you to have some servant bring in some painting supplies, and a piano. I think there might be a piano in storage somewhere. Get out of here.” You couldn’t wait until dinner that night. You wanted to spend time with her again, hopefully chatting like the two of you had the night before. You unlocked the holopad that sat on your desk to search for ideas. What was this that the two of you were doing? Was it friendship? Was it courting? No, it would have to be friendship. Courting any one, let alone a prisoner was out of the question. One of the top hits for building friendship was pursuing common interests. She’d told you her interests, reading, painting, gardening. You got up to look out the window again. She was still there, clipping and trimming the roses. You’d never been interested in gardening or painting before, but you could be if it meant spending time with her. You grabbed your helmet and decided to meet her down there. “Do you need any help?” She hadn’t heard you coming and jumped at the sound of your modified voice. She put her hand to her hand to her chest, as if to slow her own racing heart. “Oh it’s just you,” She smiled, “If you’re not too busy.” You nodded. “Here, you can hold the basket. And I’ll do the cutting.” You followed close behind her as she made her way through the rows of flowers. She looked amazing today. Different than she had all the other times you’d been this close to her. She was wearing a simple cornflower blue dress with elbow length sleeves. She had her dark hair in a braid down her back to keep it out of her face while she worked. She’s started with a wide brimmed hat on as well but had discarded it somewhere you couldn’t see, probably when she had gotten too hot. “Well, what did you do today sir?” She eventually asked you over her shoulder. “I didn’t have any meetings this morning. So not particularly much.” You replied flatly. “Well that sounds boring. If you don’t mind me saying.” “And what have you done with your day?” “I had morning tea, while reading a book. And helped Abby with some of her chores, then we had lunch together here in the garden,” She gestured to a blanket under a tree, picnic basket still holding it down, “Then she had other chores to finish so I decided to trim the flowers. I was hoping that after ward I could find some vases to put them in.” She looked up at you, “Actually, do you know where I could find vases. I had no idea where to even look.” “I can help you look in storage for some.” She smiled again. She had a nice smile, and in this moment it was just for you.

Eden

You were reading a book of poems that you had found, and soaking in the bath. It had been a great day. After looking for vases with Kylo he had also helped you arrange all the flowers you’d picked. “See, you have to clip the stems at different lengths, and you can’t put too many that are the same size close to each other. It creates dimension, and makes the arrangement interesting to look at.” You had explained while he handed you different stems. It had been a cute, quiet moment you’d shared. Such a large man with the daintiest baby’s breath in his black leather gloves. “What kind of books do you like to read, Eden.” He inquired. “Hmm. You know, I’ve never really thought much about it.” You hesitated, thinking back to some of your favorites. “I like romances I guess, and adventures. I’ll read anything really. But I’m a sucker for fairy tales.” He stayed quiet. “There is just something about a handsome prince fighting for true love that I just love. It’s a classic for a reason right?” Nothing from him again. You wondered if he was judging you. He probably thought you were just another ditzy girl. “Um… What about you, sir? Is there a specific kind of book you enjoy.” He completely bypassed your question, “What kind things do you paint?” This felt like an interrogation rather than a conversation. “I paint landscapes, and people sometimes. But you didn’t answer my question.” You said firmly. “Oh. I don’t get to read much for pleasure. I mostly read for research.” “Well that’s too bad” The two of you continued in silence until all the flowers were gone.

The next few days he sat and watched as you painted the view from the balcony that overlooked the gardens. You’d sit with him, while waiting for layers of paint to dry, and try to ask him about what he did while he wasn’t with you. It was always the same short answers. Meetings, training, military drills he had to over see, and inspections. “Isn’t there someone else you could delegate all this to? A lot of it seems like busy work that a supreme leader shouldn’t have to worry about.” He sat a little straighter when you said that. Maybe it’d never occurred to him. “Well, I have to make sure that everything is to my standard.” “Couldn’t you trust Hux to do that? Or some other general? I’m sure if you left them instructions they could do an inspection or two, or oversee drills. And maybe you just do it once a month. Then you’d have more time for yourself, and to pursue some hobbies.” You explained to him while pouring out some tea. You liked to think that the two of you had become somewhat friends, or at least had a mutual respect for each other. You wouldn’t let a friend be taken advantage of by advisors just because he may not know any better. The next day Kylo brought out his data pad and asked you to type out the instructions while he told them to you. “You’ll be able to word it better.” He shrugged when you asked why he didn’t write them himself. You made checklists for the inspections of the stormtroopers and their quarters, the TIE fighters, several over types of ships, and of different places around the base and castle. The First Order was a well oiled machine and nothing short of perfection would suffice for its Supreme Leader. Next he explained the procedures for running military drills, and you worked together to come up with a grading system so the generals could asses how the troops were doing. “There,” you saved the documents with a flourish, “You can go over all of these later and make sure you like them. Then just present it at the next meeting. And remember, you’re the Supreme Leader, no one can make you do anything you don’t want to and they all have to take your orders.” You got up from the table to work on the painting, and you could swear that Kylo was staring at you the whole time.


	6. Chapter 6

Eden

The sun was shining in on your bed and you could hear the birds singing down in the trees’s below. It was a new day, after another night of strange dreams. You’d been having these dreams for weeks now, a strange, tall man with long dark hair, a long nose, honey golden brown eyes, and a face smattered with moles and freckles. He was handsome, princely even. He wouldn’t say anything in the dreams, he would just take your hand and wrap your arm around his and walk with you through a meadow. You’d try to ask him questions, like who he was or what he wanted but he would never answer. He just smiled at you and kept walking. Every night he would stop walking, and kiss you on the forehead then you would wake up. This last night was different though, the man seemed more eager to meet with you and actually said hello. Though no sound came out when he said it. He had smiled, and kissed your hand after he took it, and rushed you off past the meadow toward what looked like a shore. Not the same one that your father had taken you too, but you knew this was some beach on this planet. You had both stood and watched the waves for a while before he turned to you and silently mouthed, “I’ll see you tomorrow, my dear.” Before he kissed your forehead again, and it was all gone. Replaced by the warm light shining through your lids, and the sounds of the singing birds outside. You had no clue who this man was, and felt slightly guilty each morning for having these vivid, intimate dreams about him. So guilty that after you had started painting him, you had the stormtroopers who watched over you help cover it up with a tarp so that Kylo would not see, as it sat out on the balcony. It felt unfair to him after he had given you so much freedom when you were supposed to be in a prison cell, to be thinking about another man. You lifted yourself out of bed, pulled on and fastened your robe just in time for a soft knock on the door. Abby let herself in, her chest heaving after having obviously ran here. “He wants to see you for breakfast.” She said between gasps for air. You looked over to the clock on the wall, 10 o’clock, well past normal breakfast time. “Right now, I’m assuming.” You panicked, shoving slippers onto your feet and trying to tie your hair into a somewhat acceptable braid, preparing to race down the hallway with Abby. When you’d made yourself decent, she nodded and took off through the open door. Two doors down from the dining room you both skidded to a stop so you could catch your breath before entering. “You wanted to see me sir?” You curtsied, as Abby closed the door behind you. “Yes,” he got up from the table and gestured to your usual spot next to him, “I wanted to see you and get your input on some things.” Your breakfast was already laid out. Shockingly so was his, but it had been eaten. You couldn’t help but stare at the setting next to yours. The wet spoon resting on the saucer for his coffee cup which was now empty. The crumbs from some pastry on a plate, and juices from fruit. You’d never seen any indication that he ever ate. You felt heat rise in your cheeks and the back of your neck. This felt intimate for some reason. He pulled out a hallow pad and tapped on it’s screen as you fixed your tea. “I had a meeting with my generals yesterday.” “And? How did they take your new ideas?” You jumped as he laughed, and the voice modulator cracked, “They hated it!” You were worried that you where about to be punished for being the one that came up with this hated idea, but he continued “They were shocked that I could ever think to give them more responsibilities than just giving out my orders during battle. So, we are going to give them even more.” You blinked at him. We? “Sure,” was all you could croak out before he thrust the halopad into your hands. He planned out a detailed schedule that included which general would have what duties and when, while you typed it all into a table on the pad. Then he had you type up notes for the speech he was going to give in his meeting today. How it was their duty to serve their Supreme Leader, whether they liked it or not. That them picking up more responsibilities would be good for morale with the troops. And if anyone had anymore objections they were more than welcome to leave. You doubted that he would actually let anyone leave the First Order, and imagined he’d come up with some clever threat during the meeting itself. He proof read it all while you finished eating, “Yes, this is perfect. Thank you.” He motioned for servants to clear his dishes as he stood and straightened his robes. “I have to go to the meeting now, but I’ll see you for lunch. I have something I want to give you.” You nodded and he rushed off. You caught yourself smiling while you got dressed back in your room. It felt good to be useful, and for him to value your input. He’d actually done what you suggested, and now he was going to reward you for how well it was going.

Kylo

She was a clever girl. No one could give you orders, and you didn’t have to do anything you didn’t want to do. When you’d taken over as the Supreme Leader, the advisors had only added on responsibilities. You’d been attending these meetings and everything else as Snoke’s apprentice, and he never came to them. Now that you were in charge why did you have to do it? You’d had to bring down the oxygen level in the throne room to finally silence the complaining of the generals when you presented Eden’s time table. It didn’t matter if they didn’t like it, they where going to do it anyway. This was going to give you so much more time to spend with her. You had to shake the idea from you head, it was inappropriate. The documents detailing the changes went out to every halopad on the base. You had read the weather reports for the week and knew that she couldn’t keep painting out on that balcony. You where rushing now, shoving papers into drawers, and throwing others into the garbage bin. If she was going to use the library it needed to be somewhat clean. After you shoved your helmet back on, you made your way to the dining room where she’d be waiting. You tried to steady your breathing, and calm your heart pounding in your ears when you reached the double doors. She was just going to start using the library also. So what if you’d both be in the same room, not during meal time. There she was, at what would be your right hand. She looked good there. She was wearing a black dress today, with long sleeves and a high collar. Her dark hair was in loose waves down her back. She really looked like she belonged by your side, you thought as you made your way to your seat but didn’t sit down. She had already finished eating the stew that had been brought out, “Let’s go.” You offered her your hand. She took it, and you looped her arm through your own leading her out and back down the hallway. Passersby either glared or tried to conceal smiles as the two of you walked together. You where sure that you looked like a good match. Eden was a beautiful young woman, and the little bit of confidence you’d seen blossom suited her. Maybe you could give her some responsibilities too. Your trousers grew a little tighter, imagining her ordering people around the castle with authority. Shaking the thoughts from your head, you stopped outside the library doors. “It is supposed to rain this week, and continue raining for a while. So you can’t keep your paintings out on the balcony anymore, and I had them brought in here.” She gasped when she took in the room. It was probably the largest library she’d ever seen. Her easel was set up in front of the large windows, and her finished paintings where resting against the wall nearby. “I had this desk brought up from storage for you to use as well. Mine is that one over there.” She ran her fingers across its surface as you said this and you pointed to the other desk on the opposite side of the room, “You’re welcome to be in here any time you like.” She turned in circles, taking in the shelves of books, “This is really all for me?” You sat at one of the sofas, “Yes. I want you to think of the castle as your home, and everything in it as yours.” Something had just occurred to her, as she almost ran to the easel covered by the tarp. Maybe she thought it’d been smudged in the moving process. “I had the troopers by extra careful with that. If they ruined it they will be punished.” You called to her. “Did you look at it?” She sounded panicked, scared almost. “No, I did not.” You answered, confused, and she returned to your side. Whatever was under that tarp, she didn’t want you to see it. You briefly considered making her show you, or sneaking a look when she wasn’t around, or even looking inside her head to see what it was. You told her that you had to go to training, and made sure she was ok to find her way back to her room on her own. She assured you that she was and put on her smock, waiting for you to leave to resume the painting. Before you closed the door all the way, you watched her pull the tarp off the canvas. You had to pull yourself away after you saw what it was to keep from barging back in and demanding answers. There on the rough canvas was your own face staring back. It was different though. The long scar on the right side of your face was gone, and there was a smile on your face. She’d painted it bright, shining, and happy. Something you hadn’t seen when you looked at yourself in a long time.

Eden

After Kylo showed you the library, it was a few weeks before you saw him again. Abby came each night and said that he was too busy for dinner. You wondered how that was true when he’d just passed a good portion of his duties off to the generals. You wondered if he’d lied and he actually had looked at the painting, and now he was mad at you. The man in your dreams was acting different too. He was aloof, and didn’t smile when he saw you anymore. He just sat on a rock, meditating, while you tried to get his attention. During the days, you helped Abby with her chores, read, and painted more. You’d put the painting of the man away in your room, and had done several small landscapes of the view from the library window. The countryside grew greener and the gardens got more and more overgrown, the more days it rained. Eventually the man in your dreams stopped coming at all. You were stuck in that damn meadow though.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I tried to make this chapter a little longer. I'm also trying to rewrite a lot of this story because it wasn't flowing nicely. Right now I'm trying to lead into a scene where I want Kylo to get extra soft and vulnerable. That will probably happen in the next chapter or two? I installed Grammarly so hopefully, this reads a bit better too.

Kylo

You had to accept the fact that there was no way she could have seen your face. You’d taken too many precautions. Even Hux and Phasma had only seen it a handful of times. How could she have painted it then? Maybe she’d seen you before, somewhere on the streets? You thought about her home planet, no, you’d never been there. You paced around the training gym, wondering. There had to be some sort of explanation. That night you rejoined her for dinner. Four weeks was too long to be away from her, though you’d never admit that you’d missed her. She was already in the dining room and wearing the red dress again. You felt a flutter in your gut and worked to push it away. She’d dressed up, knowing she was going to see you again, a part of you said. Doubt bubbled up and snatched the thought away. No, it's just a dress that she has. She doesn’t own much so of course she’d have to wear the same dress twice. You took your seat, expecting her to start her meal. She didn’t though. She just sat there with her hands folded in her lap, staring at the soup. “You may eat, Eden.” You said. Silence. “Is something wrong with the food?” “No sir. I’m just not very hungry.” You stood to leave, “Well, I have more important things to do than sit and watch your food get cold.” She didn’t move, “What did I do wrong?” she asked flatly. “Pardon me?” “What did I do wrong to make you stay away for so long? I know you weren’t really busy.” Her voice was sharp and accusatory. The servants that usually stood by and waited to take away the dishes took this as their cue to leave them alone. They shuffled around the borders of the room, and you didn’t speak until you heard the door to the kitchen close with a soft click. “I saw your painting.” You expected her to be surprised, shocked, or hurt that you would sneak around her like that. “I figured that was it. Why does it matter though? He’s just some man that was popping up in my dreams.” You stepped away from the table. In her dreams? How was that possible? “You’ve never seen this man before?” She shook her head. You sighed, all this for what. She didn’t even know. “Would you like to go for a walk with me?”

Eden

Kylo linked your arm with his and led the way out to gardens. It wasn’t raining for once, but the air was still damp and cold. When he noticed your involuntary shivering, he removed his outer robe and draped it across your shoulders. The two of you walked through the gardens, steering clear of the flower beds that had vines and weeds creeping their way into the walkway. You hadn’t been able to come out and do any weeding, and apparently no one else had cared enough to do it either. He led the way down the hill toward the lake and sat on a log washed up on the shore. He watched you walk up to the water’s edge, and stare out. The moon wasn’t quite full but it offered a good amount of light. You could feel his eye burning holes through the visor of his helmet and into the back of your head. You didn’t dare venture too far from him. The tree line around the lake was thick and pitch black, and who knew what types of creatures were lurking there. You basked in the silence and moonlight for a long while. Kylo walking a little behind you. Examining colorful rocks the peppered the shore you picked the best ones to stuff into the pockets of Kylo’s cloak to take back to the castle, breath coming in little white wisps as you shuffled along. You walked arm in arm back up the hill and stopped him before the stairs to the balcony. “Sir,” “Hmm” he hummed and the voice modifier cracked with feedback. “Do you know if there are any beaches around here? I used to go with my father all the time and I’d like to go to one again.” He extended his gloved hand to help you up the stairs, you swore that he lingered just a millisecond longer when you reached the top. The muscles just barely twitching under the tight leather, as he thought about squeezing and changed his mind at the exact same time. “I will look into it.” He replied as you handed back his cloak. You curtsied before he was gone in a whooshing of black.

Life somewhat went back to normal after that. You had breakfast alone, lunch with Abby, and dinner with Kylo. It stopped raining enough for you to tend the gardens, and read some of the many books from the library on the balcony or down by the lake. Spring was drying up into summer and the castle was getting hot and stuffy. You and Abby would sweat while you helped her with her chores. You both longed to open up the windows in the castle corridors and left in the fresh air. “Why can’t we?” You asked Abby one day while you sat “I don’t really know. It’s just always been this way. I’ve worked here since Supreme Leader Snoke, and this castle has always been dark and boarded up.” “Well, why don’t we just do it? What’s the worst that could happen? They close them again?” Abby laughed, “You should just ask the Supreme Leader. He’ll let you do anything you want.” “What makes you think that? I’m still a prisoner” you teased her back. “You forget that I also tend to his daily needs as well. I have a hunch that anything you ask for, you will get.” You mulled this over, why would she think that? Had he talked about her? “When will you see him next?” Abby glanced up at the clock on the wall, “I’m supposed to bring him his lunch in about an hour. Why?” “How busy is his schedule today?” Abby took her halopad out of an apron pocket and tapped on it, bringing up a color-coded time table. She set the pad on the table and gestured for you to look. He’s in a meeting right now, then he has a two-hour break. After it just says he’s busy, but not what he’s doing. Then you two have dinner at 6 of course, and he’s busy again right after.” You thought for a moment, would an hour be enough to change his lunch plans? “When you go to him, tell him his lunch is in the garden with me today. Tell him I am specifically requesting it if he tries to say no, and that I need to speak with him.” Abby raised her eyebrow, giving you a look, “What are you planning Eden?” You just smiled, and gave her a quick peck on the cheek, “Just make sure he comes.” You left her, racing off to the kitchen.

You’d caught the cooks just in time, they were just starting to prepare his lunch and she stopped them. “The Supreme Leader and I will be having a picnic in the garden today, instead of his usual lunch. Can you help me pack it?” The cooks were more than happy to help, packing a cold picnic lunch was much easier than cooking over the stove. They packed sandwiches, fruit, little cakes and tea, all the utensils, and a plain blanket to lay on the grass. Before you set out, you also grabbed a clean dish towel off a shelf. It would serve as a blindfold so that Kylo could actually take off his helmet and eat. It wouldn’t be fair for him to have to skip eating just because you wanted to talk to him, but you knew he’d never take it off if you’d see his face. You ran with the basket, out to the garden, and set up just in time. Abby would be telling him now, that he was to come out here. You did mental math, trying to figure out how long it would take him to walk depending on where his meeting was in the castle. It must have been close because he was there in moments with quick strides. “Perfect, you’re here.” You motioned for him to sit and then tying the towel tightly around your head. “What is all this?” He asked, the helmet still on. “I wanted to talk and eat together. But you can’t eat with me here so…” you waved your hand infant of your face and then groped around on the blanket for your plate. You’d prepared your own beforehand so that you could eat it blindly. You heard and metallic click and hiss of air release. You felt the blanket shift and he sat and heard the utensils clanking as he fixed his own plate. “What did you want to talk about?” His unaltered voice took her by surprise. It was deep and smooth like honey. “Well first, I’d like to ask your permission to do something.” “And what is that?” “I’d like to open up the drapes in the castle. It’s almost summer, and it’s getting so hot and stuffy in there. I’d like to open the castle up and let in some fresh air.” He hummed in understanding, before swallowing and answering her. “I don’t see why not. But there must be more that you wanted. A question that simple could have to wait until dinner, couldn’t it.” You blinked, behind the cloth. “No, that was the only question. But am I not allowed to request spending time with you?” He was silent while he ate some more. You decided to be the one to make a conversation. “You know, Any mentioned that she’d been here since ‘Supreme Leader Snoke’. I don’t remember hearing about anyone before you.” He drew in a sharp breath when you said the name. “You wouldn’t have. The First Order didn’t have control of your home planet when he was alive. Unfortunately for you, I was the one who changed that.” “Hm, so what position did you serve under him?” “Well, first I was an apprentice and a knight of Ren. Then I killed the master of the knights and took his position. I rose up in the ranks and commanded officers but I wasn’t quite a general. I was Snoke’s right-hand man for everything related to the Force. Until I killed him too.” “Why did you kill him?” You asked, lunch abandoned. He told you his story. How his parents had been the famous Han Solo and Leia Organa Skywalker. How after the fall of the Empire, they were both busy rebuilding the republic. Much too busy to responsibly have a child. He spent many years in meetings with his mother and on long hauls on the Millennium Falcon with his father. “I was a young boy with too much energy and I just wanted to be out playing like a normal child.” He explained. Once his mother and uncle found out that he was force sensitive they decided that his uncle would train him as his padawan. He spent the next few years traveling with his uncle, gaining notoriety as the legendary Luke Skywalker’s apprentice. “This whole time, there was a dark voice in the back of my mind. At first, I thought it was some kind of imaginary friend like normal children had. Soon it became clear to me that it was not. That it was a dark force trying to control me because he realized how powerful I would become. Just like Emperor Palpatine once controlled my grandfather, Snoke was doing the same to me.” He told you how he slowly saw the flaws in his uncle’s teachings, and the logically points Snoke made for using the dark side of the Force. He told you about the night Luke had tried to kill him, and he destroyed the temple. He went quickly through his continued training with the Knights of Ren and his accession through Snoke’s ranks. “Eventually I realized that I was much more powerful than Snoke, and I could over through him. I wouldn’t have to do his bidding anymore. He made me do so many things, and he turned me into a monster. He made me betray my uncle, my friends, he made me kill my own father to prove my loyalty. He convinced me that my mother didn’t love me anymore. So I killed him.” You stayed completely silent, glued to your seat on the blanket. You had goosebumps under your dress, and you didn’t know if it was from the sudden admission that Kylo had killed his own father or the fact that it had clearly been a few hours since you’d sat down for lunch. It was darker behind the blindfold and you could tell the sun was starting to disappear behind the tree line. You rubbed your own arms and groped to clean up plates from lunch. “I hope I didn’t make you late for some meeting. Abby said you only had a two-hour break for lunch.” You felt the blanket shift and heard the hiss and clank of his helmet being sealed again. “No, you did not. I will see you at dinner.” The voice, mechanized and distant again. You felt a cold rawness descend after he left. It was shocking that he’d trusted you enough to share what he had. Snoke had taken advantage of a young boy, who just wanted some consistency and structure in his life. He had groomed him for his own use, made him kill for him and who knows what else. All he’d wanted was a normal life.

Dinner was silent, but not in an awkward way. Or at least you thought it wasn’t. You had a better understanding of the man sitting next to you at the table. You’d been practicing in your head how to share as much as he had. You needed to even the field. You wanted him to know that he could think of you as a friend, who had mutual trust in him. You waited until the servants had finished clearing the plates from your solitary meal, and had left. “You know,” he seemed to start, surprised by the sudden conversation. “My life wasn’t as difficult as yours by far, but I had my share of issues.” He relaxed. “Obviously, you know my father is an insufferable drunk. He hasn’t always been that way though. He wasn’t like that when my mother was still alive.” You told him your story as he’d told you. You told him about how you’d been a happy little family until your mother got sick. You’d been a happy family that had picnics on the beach, went together to the market, and sat together by the fire after dinner. How your father hadn’t been able to afford a healer when it started and put food on the table at the same time. How your father probably still didn’t know that you used to go out into the busy square and sell old toys, old clothes, anything that you could get your hands on that wouldn’t be missed. You’d put the coins into the jar by the front door, never telling anyone. How after your mother died, he started drinking and gambling. How he racked up so much debt that you’d had to sell everything, including the house, and leave the planet. Then you came here and took up residence in the summer house that your uncle had gifted to you after your mother's death. She’d left it to him, but he had said he couldn’t bear to be anywhere that reminded him of her. A few months later, he turned up dead himself. No one knew how, but you had your own suspicions. “The grief was too much for him.” You explained to Kylo. “It’s been pretty calm for us, up until recently. And who knows what my father is doing now. I was the one selling my paintings, the extra eggs from the chickens, and doing seamstress work to bring in the money. I have no idea if he’s even still down in the village, or if he’s gambled and drank the rest of our money away again. The only good thing is the deed to the house has only my name on it. My uncle had been smart enough to do that.” You rose from the chair, “I never had to kill my father, but I did watch the man he used to be die. So we have that in common at least.”


End file.
